Archive for May, 2009

overheard (twice!) at thursday’s LONEY, DEAR show:



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as the past two weeks ’round these parts have seen temperatures reach into the 80-degree range, it’s time once again to take a look at the state of shorts (or “half-pants,” as i like to call them), both in my wardrobe and beyond. it is not without great trepidation that i embark upon this annual exploration, particularly in the present year, in which my shorts roster is found particularly wanting. if not necessarily for quantity, then definitely for quality (that is, unless unfortunately placed rips are so hot right now? are they?).

around this time last year, i posed the pressing question, “cutoffs of proper shorts?” and while i awaited a single answer (thanks, emily), it was an entirely disingenuous query: it’s ALWAYS been cutoffs. and cutoffs, as i currently experience them, are a singularly fascinating thing. as i naturally cannot see the benefit in sacrificing a perfectly decent pair of trousers (which unlike shorts can serve a year-round purpose, @ firepits, indie-rock shows*, court dates, and the like), the general populace from which i can choose the cut-ables consists of those slacks that would cast a shadow upon my fine status as a man of at least a moderate degree of fashion (though this is very admittedly a stretch). just yesterday, i did some gardening (“garden gear” being yet another lifeline for shitty clothes) in a pair of old navy cutoffs that have remained in my stash for almost six years now. which is slightly remarkable. they are, yes, completely unappealing. but they’ve stuck. they have gone through stints as both a bathing suit (for two years!) and running shorts (just once, i swear). and as i pulled them out yesterday, it dawned on me that there were scissors nearby, and about six candidates for mutilation hanging in front of me. the old navy shorts can remain, but they are certainly not for public consumption. and if i have to show my face one more time at the bye & bye in green cargo cutoffs, then i am certifiably done. for real.

soooo… what to cut?
this year, i am considering the drastic: denim shorts. aka, the “jean short.” i have yet to find myself in the land of the jean short, even as the popularity of such a thing has never completely vanished and even recently has seen a resurgence. it feels like a bold step.
as a result, i’m going to kick things off with black… ease into it, so to speak.
the pair in question have nothing to lose in this. in their current form, they have been nothing but a disappointment to me since i picked them off of the beacon’s closet rack. while both a near-perfect fit and a seemingly sharp pair of denims, they have never even remotely worked in my wardrobe. i don’t know what to chalk it up to, but it is what it is. and now, new life! in offering themselves up for the BIG CUT, they stand to experience at least three months (give or take) of frisbee tossin’, BBQ bossin’, backyard tooth-flossin’ F.U.N.

in other words, they stand to be seen. by eyes other than mine. eyes that perhaps won’t register shame and regret for $25 poorly placed (sorry, jeans). this is about respect, see?
and if that works well, brace yourself for an onslaught of uneven cuts and hangin’ threads… of denim.

… and probably other fabrics, too. go half-pants! -MBD

PS remember those pants that, through the miracle of the knee-high zipper, convert into shorts? not okay.

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who knew?

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