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not-on-tour diary, part 8.

26 January 2009: Jack Lewis embarks on a brief-ish European tour with the so-called Fishermen Three. According to Jack Lewis’s MySpace page, I remain a drummer for Jack Lewis’s band. On 26 January 2009, I sit in a Binghamton, NY airport lounge eating coconut date bars, waiting to board a somewhat terrifying propeller aircraft. In a day’s time, I will not be in Europe.

tuesday, 3 february

cluny : Newcastle

The Oregon Liquor Control Commission (OLCC) maintains a decidedly notorious presence in Portland. A team of grandparents (literally, I’m sure), they rule over this city’s boozeries with a geriatric fist. Tonight I am shocked (as in, not at all surprised) to learn that a separate license is required to allow patrons to drink inside a door, and then directly outside a door, even when said door remains within the boozery’s domain. While I am only slightly amazed to find that the presence of a swinging door treads the line between lawfulness and crime, I was getting cold anyhow (take that, establishment!), and it’s not that easy to turn a page while sporting two layers of glove.

Inside the boozery (which is not so much a boozery, and more so much a coffee shop w/ booze), there is an extravagant and admirably silly installation along the northern wall. Having seen this work a few times previously, I am amused to discover that it is “best” viewed in 3D. Upon being handed a set of 3D glasses, circa 1986, I become fascinated with the idea that the literal lenses through which we view 3D work have remained entirely static since I was a child (i.e., disposable paper glasses, seemingly mass-produced for the more robotically shaped).

suits love 3D.

suits love 3D.


I think at age 11, I would have imagined that we’d have some kind of inherent ability to produce and view all art in 3D by 2009. That we would laugh heartily at such funky accoutrements of the past. But then, here I am, in February ’09, staring at a wall with cardboard glasses, wondering what all the fuss is about. At 29, I have yet to be even remotely impressed by anything bearing the tag 3D. I can’t simply believe that it’s not out there; that one day I won’t pop on a pair of those funky goggles and find my jaw suddenly agape, and tears of amazement welling up in the corners of my eyes. But until then, guy with the zany artwork at Backspace, I liked your work a hell of a lot better without the glasses.

Jack Lewis is in Newcastle tonight, which is both a football team and a beer. I’ve never been.

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